Accepting That You’ll Do Almost Anything to Avoid Feeling Your Feelings

Let’s be honest—we all avoid our feelings sometimes. I still do, and that’s okay. In fact, it’s healthy to have moments where we take a break from heavy emotions.

But if we only avoid our feelings—if avoidance becomes our default—it’s a scientific fact that our health will eventually suffer. Reference: Suppressed emotion creates disease

Get Curious About Your Addictions and Patterns

Almost any addiction, whether "good" or "bad," is often a way we’ve learned to avoid feeling our emotions. And like everything in life, this isn’t black and white.

For example, going to the gym is wonderful—obviously. But if we go every single time we feel something uncomfortable, and we never make space to actually process our emotions, then we might be using exercise as a way to escape. That’s an opportunity to reflect.

Or maybe after a tough day, you pour yourself a drink. Nothing wrong with that. But if you always reach for a drink when you’re struggling—and never take time to feel, process, or show yourself compassion—that’s another opportunity for growth.

Feeling Your Feelings Is Essential—But It’s Not the Whole Picture

We’ve touched on this already, but it’s worth repeating: feeling your grief, pain, and challenges is necessary. It’s a critical part of healing and living fully.

But if all we do is feel—without moving forward—we risk getting stuck, cycling through the same emotions over and over, and creating unhealthy patterns in our neurology.

What this book will help you discover is that when we have the courage to feel our emotions and then fill ourselves with Love and Compassion, we find ourselves moving forward. We find ourselves growing. Our emotional responses become healthier and happier. And we gain the clarity and courage to truly live.

Experience 2 • An Emotional Health Audit

This audit is here to help you build awareness and shine a light on the opportunities ahead. It’s not meant to diagnose, label, or define you in any way.

One of the keys to grieving, happiness, and overall well-being is vulnerability. And at the heart of vulnerability is emotional exposure—the ability to fully allow and feel your emotions in your body and express them in some way, whether to yourself or to someone else.

This audit will simply help you understand your current comfort level with emotional exposure.

My hope is that as you move through this book and fully engage with the experiences, you’ll see your scores improve over time. You’ll naturally develop greater compassion for your fears and emotions, and you’ll start to enjoy the deeper intimacy, fulfillment, and peace of mind that come with living more authentically.

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Estimated Time Required:

10 – 20 minutes

You Will Need:

If you’ve set up your Self-Healing Sanctuary from Week 1 [Experience] Book & Space great. If not just do this wherever you can relax and disconnect from the world. </aside>

When was the last time you felt not okay, and you let yourself be, sit and relate to yourself? This includes if you went for a walk in nature on your own, contemplating and feeling your tough moments. Or when you journaled about a challenging experience. Or when you share your painful feelings with a loved one or professional.
1. NEVER = 0
2. In the last 3 months = 1
3. In the last month = 2
4. In the last week = 3
Are you aware of having felt angry, sad, scared, happy and grateful recently? This includes the cousins of anger, called frustration, irritation, annoyance. And sad’s cousins: disappointed, down, and low. And scared’s cousins: anxious, overwhelmed, confused, lost and doubtful. And happy’s cousins: joyful, content, psyched, excited and good. And grateful’s cousins: calm, peaceful, fulfilled, okay.
1. I have felt anger in my body in the last week = 1
2. I have felt sadness in my body in the last week = 1
3. I have felt scared in my body in the last week = 1
4. I have felt happy in my body in the last week = 1
5. I have felt grateful in my body in the last week = 1
When was the last time you cried? It could be in a wedding, or at the end of a movie. Or because you watched a touching or sad reel on instagram, or because you’re grieving. It could be for absolutely any reason at all.
1. I can’t remember crying in the last year = 0
2. I think I have cried in the last year = 1
3. I have cried in the last few months = 2
4. I have cried in the last month = 3
When someone gets upset or starts to cry in front of me, I usually respond by:
1. Telling them that they’re okay, they’re strong, they don’t need to cry, and doing whatever you can to comfort them into not crying = 0
2. Ignore that it’s happening and hope they take you checking out as a sign that you don’t want them to get emotional = 1
3. Stay connected with them and be kind and supportive, while locking down your own feelings and trying to be the strong, okay one = 2
4. Stay connected with them while being kind, supportive and letting yourself feel your own emotion at the same time = 3
Use this only as an encouragement, not as a diagnosis in anyway.
1. 0 - 3. Take this work slowly. Be kind and patient with yourself. You’ve done a wonderful job at protecting yourself from painful emotion, and probably also been working very hard to shelter others from the ‘burden’ of your emotions too. The first big step for you will probably include awakening to the truth that feeling and sharing your emotions is NOT a burden. But in fact a gift. It’s a gift to let someone into your heart: into the mess of your deepest fears and feelings. And without letting someone into that magical mess within, we can’t create authentic and intimate relationships. So move slowly and sweetly as you dive into this work. If you’re able, I highly suggest working with a professional, or some form of group work support as you move through this book.
2. 4 - 7. You are feeling your emotions and have at least some comfort with experiencing and sharing emotion. This is a wonderful foundation to dive into this work from. This book will hold your hand and guide you through deepening your current ability to feel and heal, and will support you in grieving not just so you can stop crying, but so that you can truly transform your rainbow loved one into a guardian angel and companion for the rest of your life. Dive deeply into the experiences. And you’ll get more out of them if you are able to share your experiences with another, either a professional, a trusted loved one or support group.
3. 8 - 11. You have evolved into an emotionally intelligent human, that has evidently poured a lot of time and effort into healing and evolving into your gifts and emotional health. This book will support you in transforming the richness of your life, into greater clarity, courage and abundance. Using these guides, and compassionately grieving your rainbow loved ones will help you access the clarity and direction you need to truly create the kind of life you want. Remember your moments of emotional disturbance throughout the day are not here to block or stop you. They are here to help you feel, heal and reveal your next steps in life.
4. 12 - 14. You are a rare being, in a world that has worked hard to teach you that you’ll be better off if you hide your emotions, and just keep it all together. You will be able to use this book to further springboard yourself into your living your purpose and supporting others along their path as well. You are probably already feeling and experiencing your rainbow loved ones well. Use this book to help you expand into your spiritual gifts and your ability to use their love and wisdom to create a truly spectacular life.

Dogs and Children are your guiding Lights and angels throughout this process. As adults, we’ve incorrectly learned that being emotionally exposed is weak and less. This book will help you expand into the truth, proven by neuroscience and your own experience, that allowing emotion like a child does, or a dog does, helps us live the happiest and healthiest lives possible.

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Nice! Week 2 Experience Complete 🧡 🧡 🧡

[NEXT] Reading is Week 3 [Reading] Allowing Ourselves to Be Shaken Awake

[BACK] Return to Week 2 [Reading] Why the World Avoids Grief—And Why Embracing It Is Key to Our Well-Being if you missed it

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WATCH Week 2 Recording Laying the ground work.

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