Welcoming the Tidal Waves, and Staying in Our Body When They Hit

If we want to make sure that our grief doesn’t change our neural pathways, and subsequently our patterns and life’s path negatively, we need to allow some of the tidal waves of our grief fully.

It is important to note however, that it’s impossible to feel our grief all the time.

Sometimes, when you’re at work, or in the store, a huge wave of emotion will come, and you may choose to suppress it.

And sometimes, when and as you choose, I hope you actively allow the huge tidal waves of grief to be welcome and allowed through your body.

The guide below will of course hold your hand and support you in allowing the tidal waves of grief to be allowed to be received.

The great news I can share is that when we do have the courage to go down, to surrender, and we welcome the tidal wave wholeheartedly, that it does clear us out. It cleans us out. So much of the pressure that has been building is released. And we do feel lighter afterwards.

Simply Relax and Release

This experience is best done when the Tidal Waves come naturally. And it CAN be done at ANY time, it will just be easier when the energy is already moving, rather than by recalling it.

It’s hard to describe emotional experiences clearly with words, because we are all wired differently and we all have very different emotional reference points.

When I say relax your body: we all interpret very differently.

So this is not an exact science. It’s much more of an art form. So trust yourself and trust your unique way through this.

“When you feel the pull, like somebody pulling on your heart, you just let go. You fall behind it. You simply relax and release.”

MICHAEL SINGER

These are also some wonderful analogies to help us experience viscerally in the body, how to relax and embody. Use the one or ones that resonate and work best for you.

Relaxing Analogy 1: Unclenching A Fist

A helpful way to understand how to let go and feel emotions in our bodies is to visualize our entire body as a clenched fist. As we gradually relax and open our hands, we can also imagine releasing the tension in our bodies. This act of unclenching allows us to more easily experience and recognize the emotions that are present within us. By opening ourselves up, we create space to fully feel and process whatever feelings arise.

Relaxing Analogy 2: A Blooming Flower

A different approach to letting go of resistance and truly experiencing our feelings and grief is to visualize ourselves as a tight flower bud. Gradually, we can imagine our petals opening, allowing our flower to bloom. As we gently unfurl each petal, we create space for all our emotions to be felt. This process encourages us to embrace and acknowledge our feelings fully.

Relaxing Analogy 3: Hands Up on a Rollercoaster

When we experience grief, it’s important to surrender to the feelings rather than resist them. Imagine holding onto the bar of a rollercoaster tightly, your muscles tense and constricted. This resistance can make the emotions feel even heavier and they’ll stay much longer than they need to. Instead, try to open up—raise your hands in the air and let go of that tight grip. Allow the energy and emotions, whatever they may be, to flow freely through your body.

Experience 4 • Allowing Waves of Emotion for Clearing and Renewal [A Guided Somatic Release]

Use my words below as guide posts, and go more for the heart of the exercise, rather than following the details.

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Estimated Time Required:

20 – 30 minutes +

You Will Need:

Your Self-Healing Book.
If you’ve set up your Self-Healing Sanctuary from Week 1 [Experience] Book & Space great. If not just do this wherever you can relax and disconnect from the world. </aside>

Get Relaxed. Ideally you’re in your sacred space or somewhere you can relax and feel safe. Take the time to grab a blanket, light a candle, adjust your body position. Do whatever you need to relax and focus on yourself for the next half hour or so.
Set a Clear Healing Intention
- Write a positive intention for your healing at the top of your page. Be sure to include the phrase “for the Highest Good.” This helps guide your consciousness toward healing.
- If you have religious or spiritual beliefs, ask for support from your higher powers. This could be a prayer or a meditation that helps you connect with your inner guidance.
- For example, when I’m in a hurry, I write something simple like: "Intention – to clear as much as I can for the highest good."
- When I have more time and energy, I might write something like: "Intention – I am here to clear, release, and lift as much karma, trauma, negativity, and negative patterns as I can for the highest good. I am here to release the sadness and pain in my heart. I am here to experience as much joy, meaning, hope, and relief as I can. I am here to feel as good as possible."
Now focus on being fully in your body, and begin to relax and release.
- Use some natural, slow breathing.
- Or use a little breath work, Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR) or Release Energy Resistance (RER) from Week 3 [Experience] A Simple Nervous System Reset
First, just observe the energy within your physical form and welcome it whole heartedly. Take a whole minute or more, just to pay attention to what you’re sensing, feeling, experiencing in your body, and to embrace what you’re feeling, and continue to release any resistance to experiencing it.
- Consciously but silently let your body know that you are safe. Remind your body that you have not always been safe to feel fully, but that now is a safe and sacred moment and you can feel fully.
- You might use an analogy of a loving embrace, to communicate to your body that it is safe, held and supported. Like a huge hug from someone safe and loving.
If you're aware right now, of a wave of emotion or grief already moving in your body, just do your best to allow it, feel it, welcome it fully in your body–you can skip #7.
Take a little time to allow yourself to connect as deeply as you can with your loved one, and to any feelings you have been experiencing recently. You might like to pull up some photos or video on your phone, or go to the place in your home where you would often be together. Vulnerably, and courageously let yourself connect to the feelings that have been triggered recently by the passing of your loved one.
Feel whatever your feeling within your body. Continue to:
- Relax any tightness, or ways you find you’re resisting what you’re feeling in your body.
- Keep moving the focus from your mind, into your body. Let go of any thoughts that come up.
- If things feel overwhelming, focus on your breath. Let it rise and fall naturally. No need to force it, just let it happen. And use the next analogies to help you continue relax, and release.
Use these analogies to help you continue to relax, release, and feel:
- Relate your whole body to being a clenched fist. Gently ask your body to open little by little, letting go of the sadness or pain, as you open anything clenched.
- Your body is a flower bud. Let it open and bloom slowly, softly.
- Relate to the waves of your emotions, like you are on a roller coaster. You might want to hold on tight and resist fully feeling your emotions, but try to let go, open your arms, and feel the ride. Your emotions are not against you, or negative in anyway. Allow your emotions just to be energy.
Acknowledge What You’re Feeling
1. What is the strongest sensation and do your best to acknowledge the best word for it. Is it sadness? Is it terror? Is it shame? Confusion? Frustration?
2. You can use this Reference: List of Emotions to help you.
Now continue to feel, and be supportive and curious.
1. Where are you feeling this the most? Maybe your chest feels tight? Or there’s a pit in your stomach? Or your shoulders and neck feel heavy and droopy?
2. If this feeling had a color – what color would it be? Is it dark or light? A bright painful red, or a dark, murky, gross brown? Is it opaque or translucent?
3. Does it have texture and movement? If it did, how would you describe it?
Continue to feel the emotions and sensations in your body while being supportive, curious. Simply allow the emotions and sensations in your body to naturally do what they do–i.e. release, resolve and balance.
- There’s really nothing for you to ‘do’ here, but to allow your emotions to have their own way in your body.
- Consider your body is like a river after a storm. When debris and fallen branches clog the flow, the water becomes turbulent, stuck, and chaotic. And just allowing the river to be the river, is the only thing needed to gradually and gently unravel and heal the flow. But we want to fix, try and push. Don’t do that. Don’t do anything. When we stop resisting and doing, and give our emotions room and acceptance to move, they can flow through us instead of keeping us stuck.
- Allow yourself to have acceptance, compassion and understanding for yourself. [We will be learning how to activate our self-compassion in Week 5 [Reading] Compassion: The Key to Healing Grief and Week 5 [Experience] Allowing Self-Compassion , but for now, do your best to experience loving and compassion for your feelings and your humanity. In can be powerful simply to be aware of how you would support a friend feeling what you’re feeling–and simply treat yourself that way.]
When you feel a shift or stillness, do some deep, clearing breaths:
- Breathe in and picture bright, cleansing light filling your head.
- As you breathe out, imagine this light flooding through your body, all the way to your fingertips and toes.
- Keep breathing in the light, letting it grow bigger. As you breathe out, feel it cleansing every part of you.
- Do this for a minute or so.
Thank and reward yourself for having the courage to feel. Genuinely say ‘thank you’ to yourself for completing this experience, and ask yourself what reward would feel self-honoring and empowering?! And now go treat yourself with what feels supportive and celebratory.

Every Tidal Wave is FOR You. It’s here to help you release and be renewed.

It’s here to wash away your pain, and leave you cleansed and connected with Love.

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Amazing ❤️‍🔥 That’s Week 4 Complete 🏆 🎉 😁 🙌

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